Lifebread

So, about this summer. I only give myself permission to enjoy bragging rights because I have my plans made before Christmas break, when a lot of college kids won’t even know next May when it’s really crunch time. The quality of my plans is just a perk.

Well honestly I don’t know what I’ll be doing this summer either, at least not specifically, but I do know that I’ll be interning with Lifebread. Lifebread is a ministry whose mission is to share not only the spiritual, but also the physical bread of life. What our team will actually be doing is going to a community in Togo, Africa and building bread ovens and teaching the people how to use them to provide food for their community. My understanding is that I will be in charge of a nutrition education element that will be incorporated into our time there as well. This is PERFECT for me because it is a form of exactly what I want to do long-term. This is living out exactly what Christ teaches us, to give people access to Him while also meeting their physical needs. We can give people a way to live AND something worth living for!

I don’t know all of the logistics of the internship this summer, but I do know that I’ll be spending a month-ish in Africa and that after that our team will be coming back to the States to plan and execute a fundraising tour. As it was described to me, this is basically a crash course in non-profit PR. And speaking of our team, there are 5 students from around the country and Lifebread’s founder, Dusty Breeding and his wife Cecily as far as I know. I could not be more excited to get to know my team and start this adventure!!!

Check out Lifebread, the mission, and the interns! www.lifebread.org

We can do all things

It’s getting to that point in the lives of my friends and myself when we’re starting to think about what we want to be when we grow up. It’s not really a matter of when we grow up as much as…well, kind of facing it straight on. Lately I’ve been hearing people talk about their plans for the future and realizing how much we take for granted that we can do virtually anything with our lives. Of course, I’m including myself in that. We talk about studying abroad and going on mission trips and moving across the country and having our dream jobs and pursuing our passions and changing the world as if there were no obstacle that could possibly stand in the way of those things. Really, our world is an open book, full of possibility and promise for a better future, the best future. You can call it naïveté or whatever you will, but our generation really believes in our hearts that we can do anything and everything. And maybe we can. May we not become jaded. May we keep that fire and that conviction that we can truly do all things, but not forget that we are nothing and can do nothing without Christ and His Spirit that lives and works inside of us. If the glory is not going to Him, all of our big accomplishments are worthless.

Satan can shove it

Satan, man that dude is tricky. He really knows what he’s doing. How did he get me to forget about grace?! Over the past couple weeks he’s been working pretty hard to show me all the ways I am falling short of the way God wants me to be living, and I’ve been caught up in all the little things I think I’m supposed to be doing: “Oh, I’ve heard about twelve new causes this week and they’re all worthy of being supported, and I think I’ll start sponsoring a child, and I’ll give money to build wells in Africa, and I’ll volunteer at this soup kitchen, and I’ll recycle so I can be ecologically responsible, oh, and I need to pray more, and I should be journaling, and I haven’t counted my blessings yet today, and I need to exercise to take care of this body God gave me, and who have I talked to about God, and…” Of course those are all great things to do, but there is also something to be said for focusing your efforts. Trying to micromanage my own life and turning my relationship into a checklist makes me feel like I’m failing if I don’t get things perfectly every day. Thank God for His grace that is sufficient to transcend my weaknesses and failings.

His grace is sufficient

There is so much of me that strives to be close to God, but at the same time there is so much that pulls away from Him, even fights Him. Tension is always there. And it makes me afraid to learn more about God and what He wants for my life because I know that I’ll find out that I’m still so far away from what He wants me to be. I’ve got to learn to take this journey one day at a time and lean on God to help me grow in Him rather than becoming overwhelmed when I see how far away from Him I still am. His promise is that His grace is enough to cover my inadequacies and that when I draw near to Him, He will in turn draw near to me. He truly is my Savior, my Rock, and my Redeemer.

“From the cowardice that dare not face new truth,
From the laziness that is contented with half truth,
From the arrogance that thinks it knows all truth,
Good Lord, deliver me.”

Make me weaker

My humanity drives me crazy sometimes. I don’t like being weak or feeling like I need to depend on other people. It’s just who I am, it’s how I always have been. I’m not sure if it should be called “independence” and labeled as a good thing, or “arrogance” and labeled as a bad thing. But this weekend whatever it was really hit me in the face. It started when I was kind of blindsided by the fact that real life is coming a lot faster than I had noticed and that I am completely unprepared for it. Required undergrad internship? RD exam? Grad school? Career? I guess those were all things that I knew were going to happen, but they were so far in the future that I didn’t really take them seriously. (Honestly, I’m glad I haven’t thought about it yet. It’s been nice to just enjoy where I’m at and not stress about the future. I would highly recommend it.) But the reality is that those things will all likely be part of my future, and there is a lot to do to prepare for them.

This weekend my family was in town to visit Matthew and me. It was really good to see them, but I was so overwhelmed that it was tough to enjoy the time we had together. I had so much on my mind and was so stressed, but I didn’t want to let go of it or let anyone help me. I just decided to keep it all inside and try to hash it out on my own, and the result was that I was super awful to be around all weekend. Looking back, I can see that I had a perfect opportunity to take advantage of my family being right there to help me work out what was going on, but I was too concerned with dealing with things on my own to see what was right in front of me.

But I can’t stand that part of myself sometimes that wants to curl up in a ball with my head on someone’s lap or have a good cry. My thought is always that other people have such heavier issues than I do and that I need to suck it up and get over myself. And I think sometimes that’s true; I think it would be a little excessive if the little bumps and scrapes of life brought me to tears every day. But on the other hand, Paul says in 2 Corinthians that our Savior’s power is displayed in our weakness. He is able to show His power through the times when I don’t have it all together, when I admit that I can’t do it on my own. I pray that God would grant me the humility to accept help and to ask for it when I need it. My weakness is all for His glory.

In awe

Usually at Sanctuary (our Thursday night worship service) everybody is on their feet the whole time, just excited to be praising God together. But tonight as we were singing about how God is indescribable, uncontainable, all-powerful, unchangeable, how He has placed the stars in the sky and how the earth will shake at Jesus’ return, I wondered how I could possibly stand on my feet in front of such a powerful and awesome God. I sat down in my chair, convicted of my unworthiness to stand in God’s presence, His holiness beyond comparison with my brokenness. I don’t understand why God loves me and continues to pursue me in spite of my pride and selfishness and all of the times I put what I want in front of what He wants. I am so unworthy of being in His presence, yet He loves me so much more than I can even know. I cannot help but be changed by that knowledge. I cannot help but give Him everything.

...those who persecute you?

Last night while I was praying before bed it came to my mind Jesus’ command to love our enemies and to pray for those who persecute us. So I started to do just that. And it didn’t take very long. I realized I couldn’t really think of any direct enemies or sources of persecution in my own life. Sure, America has its enemies, but mostly because we’re a major world power, not because our country is standing up for Christ in the face of opposition. I just can’t think of any for myself in particular. Jesus’ imperative to love our enemies and to pray for those who persecute us implies that there is a likelihood of there being people out there who won’t like what we’re doing, that we’re going against the grain and bringing light to places that have long been in the dark. The fact that I can’t think of any persecution toward myself makes me wonder, am I really going all out for Christ?

Trust me

God has been showing His beautiful face in my life in so many ways. Maybe I’m just looking harder for Him. But I’m falling so in love with Him, I can’t deny it. The joy that comes with being in relationship with Him is my sustaining power as life picks up its pace.

I keep coming into contact with the importance of trust. Do I trust God to do what He says He will do, that He will reign in the world and that He will lay out a path for me? Do I believe that He can take my imperfect self and do something momentous, or do I insist that there are certain mountains that simply cannot be moved? More and more I am being convinced that God is putting certain opportunities in my way, ones that I would normally be afraid to jump into, and convicting me that He certainly is big enough to do His work. Here I am, sitting in my closet, just one person in a sea of humanity. But God works through the weak, through those who have nothing to offer, and Lord knows both of those apply to me. Here I am, Lord. Send me. I put all my trust in You.

Oops...

It’s amazing how easily I forget about what’s really important. When I was in Honduras it was so crucial for me to spend time reading my Bible and feeding myself spiritually because I didn’t have anything else to fill me up. I was so aware of how necessary Jesus was to complete me. Then I came home and was back with all of my friends and family and back in my comfort zone where it was easy for me to feel fulfilled by those people and environments. When I left Honduras one of the things I could have told you was so important in my life and something that I had learned to do so much better since being there was spending time daily reading the Bible and talking to God. But when I got back all of that seemed to fall by the wayside because of that false sense of fulfillment that came with all being back in my comfort zone. I didn’t need Jesus when I had my friends and family around me. Oh, how quickly I forget. Once you get out of those habits it’s so difficult to get back into them, just like when you don’t exercise for a long time and then you’re out of shape and it just sucks trying to get past the soreness and back to the point when you feel strong and healthy. Now I’m at that point where I feel spiritually out of shape and am trying to get over the hump and back into the habit of being spiritually disciplined. It really is a discipline and takes repetition and practice and diligence and will power to get right. But just like the memory of how good it felt to be in shape is enough to make me want to start exercising again, the memory of how wonderful it feels to have Jesus at the forefront of my life and always in my thoughts and the master of my days is enough to make me want to get back to that point. And I won’t waste any time.

In the End...

Usually when I have so much time between my blogs I take up all my space playing catch up, but I think this one will be different. I’ve been home for a week and a half now, and it feels so good! But I also think I’m getting to the point where I am slowing down and starting to really miss being there. I miss the boys, I miss my homeless friends, I miss the Shine kids, I miss Alli and Tess and Amber and even Darwin sometimes. Of course, I missed everything from home while I was there too. I guess that’s what it feels like to have your heart split between two places. There will always be a part of it that longs to be somewhere else, and maybe sometime I’ll get used to that feeling.

I don’t really think I experienced culture shock when I got to Honduras, but I did feel it when I got back to the States. I think it’s because when you go to a different country you expect things to be different. And I’ve been to Honduras enough that I pretty much knew what to expect. But when you come back home you think nothing will seem weird because that’s what you know best, and then you realize you’re wrong. When I first stepped off the plane in Indy, the aesthetics threw me for a loop first. It’s so green, and it’s so flat, and it’s so cold! It was weird. As far as general culture goes, when I got to Houston I noticed that the way that would have been typical for an upper class Honduran to dress and present themselves was pretty much the norm for Americans. That might seem pretty obvious, but it was one of the first things that hit me coming back. There is so much more wealth here, it’s ridiculous, and I mean that.

People of course have their FAQ’s that I keep hearing since I’ve been back. It seems like nobody really knows where to start, so they just ask “How was Honduras?!” And what am I supposed to say to that? Lol, I usually just say, “It was wonderful, fantastic, so so good!” And that’s all they really want to know, they’re happy to know I’m back safely with all my limbs still attached. And that’s fine with me, I’m glad to give that answer and leave it at that. But other people actually want to know the details, and I’m also glad to share those. If you’re reading my blog I’m assuming you care to know details, so I’ll share a few.

Yes, I’m glad I went, I don’t regret it at all, and yes, I would love to go back again, but no, I don’t know when that will happen. I doubt I’ll go back again for an extended period of time, I feel like God was calling me there for three months and that’s all for now. My favorite thing about being there was the relationships I was able to build, with the people I lived with, worked with, and served. There is something special about a relationship between people that is based solely on love, without any other expectations. Pretty much all I had to give was a plate of food with a big side order of love, and when you give all the love you can, the returns are incredible. I would recommend it.

What did I learn? That everybody has a heart and soul, no matter what socioeconomic background they are from, or what language they speak, or where they grew up, or what their beliefs are, or you fill in the blank. It doesn’t matter. Everyone deserves to be loved, and from now on I will look at people with that filter. I mean, in the end isn’t that what it all boils down to anyway?

Last Hurrahs

Lately we keep calling everything we do our “last hurrah.” If there is something fun we want to do, we usually do it with the excuse of it being our last opportunity. We have had a few over the past week or so, and I think a couple are worth mentioning.

First of all, we took a trip to Belize! It was time for Amber to renew her visa, so we decided it would be a fun last trip for all of us to take together. Besides the actual trip itself, Belize had several last hurrahs. We left on Tuesday and after an eventful day and a half of travel by buses, taxis, and boats we arrived in Placencia, Belize. If you’ve never been to Belize but love the beach, I would recommend it as a prime vacation option. It was so relaxing and beautiful! It was kind of like time just slowed down for a couple of days. In Belize they speak English, Spanish, and this combination Belizean language…but pretty much everyone speaks English. We kept trying to speak to people in Spanish, and they would just look at us like we were crazy. What else is new.

The second day we were there we decided to go snorkeling on the reef. The decision wasn’t an easy one. Manatees are in Belize at this time of year and we really, really wanted to see one, especially Alli (who also thought that they were around her size. She was pretty surprised when we told her she wasn’t going to be able to hug one because they’re actually like 12 feet long). So anyway, we wanted to see a manatee, but the manatee tours were really expensive and didn’t guarantee that you would even see one. And our big dream was to swim with the whale sharks, but that turned out to be out of the question anyway because you have to wait until a full moon which doesn’t happen until next week. But we couldn’t think of a reason not to go snorkeling on the second largest reef in the world, so that was what we settled on. It was definitely a good choice! We saw a whole mess of colorful coral, all these different fish, starfish, barracudas, sea urchins, big clouds of minnows you could swim right through, a sting ray, stuff like that. We were definitely not disappointed! Other things we justified as being last hurrahs were the three trips we made to the local gelato shop (the last one being at 8 am the morning we left), Alli’s decision to splurge on a big, beautiful hammock, and the hours we all spent sitting on the beach soaking up the Belizean sun.

After another day of buses and boats, we arrived back home late Friday night. By the time we got back I felt like I needed to take a vacation from my vacation! All that traveling will wear you out! But we were definitely all happy with the way things worked out!

Last night was our last hurrah dinner. Amber made all of our favorites, fajitas, tortilla chips with salsa, these jalapeño things with cream cheese and bacon that the other girls love, and a cinnamon sugar chocolate coffee cake for dessert (yes, it is as delicious and as unhealthy as it sounds).

The best part about the last week or two has been all of the quality time Alli, Tess, Amber and I have been able to spend together. We have taken advantage of all the fun things we have gotten to do together and have just been absorbing all of the laughs, trying to have as much fun as we can to make it last as long as possible after we’re not together anymore. Sure it’s sad to think about leaving, but I’m trying to focus less on that and more on being in the moment. And since there never seems to be a dull moment here, that seems like it makes the most sense!

Scavenging

Hondurans really do have more fun. Here’s the story. The other night I mentioned scavenger hunts and Amber adamantly requested having one organized in honor of her birthday that is coming up next week. We told her today, Saturday, would be the best day to do it. So last night we dreamed up possibly the most fun scavenger hunt ever. We referenced a bunch of inside jokes and events we’ve all experienced together over the past few months.

This morning we finished our preparations and by two in the afternoon we were finally ready to start. We were estimating that our epic plans would take about two hours. We were mistaken. The first clue led to the park up the street from our house, all of our (including the puppies, Tasha and Toby’s) favorite place since its construction over Thanksgiving. There, Amber had to search for clues to things that we’ve done at the park. The best view in Tegucigalpa can be seen from one of the benches, the seesaw will be the death of the Shine kids one day if they keep jumping off while their partner is still up in the air across from them, the futbol cancha is Darwin’s favorite place there, and you could “scavenge” for pieces of candy under the piñata hanger. With the last clue at the park we placed a bottle of Welch’s sparkling grape juice as a clue to the final surprise.

Her next clue led her to a book that Tess and Alli bought for Amber and brought back in January entitled “A Thousand Miles, A Hundred Years.” From there, she was instructed to use the computer (with iTunes already cued up) to search for the songs we had sung at karaoke last night (another part of her birthday celebration). We had recorded our own versions of the four songs we had sung, three of which told her to keep searching and one of which gave her the next clue. The next clue about me being a pro at stalking by this method directed her to Facebook, where we had posted the next clue on her wall.

The clue led us out of the house to the only place in Honduras that will satisfy your craving for Nutella, the super delicious crepes restaurant in the mall. After she told the chef that he was “el mejor chef en el mundo,” she was given her next clue that directed her to the grocery store, La Colonia. Her next clue came with birthday candles (another clue to the final surprise) and took us to the movie rental store where Amber once flirted with the guy behind the counter in order to rent some movies we didn’t quite have enough money to pay for. There we gave her a clue with a quote from one of our favorite movies, Baby Mama. Inside the movie box was a clue that told her to go to the restaurant where we experienced the worst service in the city, Tony Roma’s. She had to go inside and ask who Tony Roma was and if she could please speak with him. Unfortunately, he wasn’t available for comments. After that, she was directed to MultiPlaza Mall where, at the YogenFruz store the other day, we were the unwilling audience to a PG-13 face-sucking show put on by the Honduran couple in front of us at the counter. Her task there was to order herself whatever kind of frozen yogurt she wanted…and of course Alli, Tess, and I did the same : ) Her next clue sent her downstairs to Seventeen, the store where she once tried on this dress whose hideousness she was apparently the only one unable to see. Needless to say, we didn’t let her buy it. There was crazy traffic getting out of the mall, so we just made her guess the next two places, the Breaking Chains building and el parque, our third feeding stop, for the sake of time. At this point we pulled out fake moustaches that we told her she had to wear for the rest of the hunt. Tess and Alli and I also wore them. Probably my favorite part of the whole event was sticking my head out the window as we waited in traffic and having cars back up to get a better look at car full of crazy Gringas wearing fake moustaches. When we finally got out of the traffic we made our way to Chili’s, Amber’s favorite restaurant that we won’t go to unless it’s a weekday during lunch hours (because that’s when they have the best specials, of course!). There we gave her huge plastic martini glasses (another final surprise clue). Our last stop was a place none of us had actually been before called the Cupcake Café. It ended up being the perfect final stop! We brought in the candles, martini glasses, and sparkling grape juice and had our own little birthday celebration. The store was so cute, Amber says she wants to go back on her actual birthday for lunch!

The whole extravaganza took not two, but four hours. But it was worth every preparation and every minute! To top off a wonderful day, we went out to feed our homeless friends and followed it up with a trip to the cine to see a movie. See, I told you Hondurans have more fun.

My boys

I don’t know how to tell the stories of the things that happen here. Sometimes I feel like I’m gypping those who faithfully read my blog out of getting to experience this with me like I wish you all could, and I want to apologize for that. I guess I just don’t think that words can do it justice. Telling stories has never been one of my fortes and certain things that happen here are tough for me to retell, usually just because I can’t find words that are sufficient enough to communicate my experiences and how the people here touch my heart with what they say and do. Also, some days there are just too many things to write down. But I can tell you that any story I could possibly tell about the things that have happened while I’ve been in Honduras can be summed up by saying this: It’s all about Jesus, it’s all about people, and it’s all about loving both with everything you are.

That being said, I’m want to mention the boys’ home called Veintiuno that we’ve been going to the past few weeks. I really haven’t mentioned much about it, but it has definitely embedded itself in my heart and I think I should share how with you.

From the moment we walk through the door to the moment we leave, I don’t think the smile leaves my face or the faces of the boys who live there. There are about 40-50 boys living there at a time and I don’t know many of their names, but I recognize all of their faces and love each of their hearts. Some of them are troublemakers, some just joke around all the time, some are sweet, some are shy and quiet. Some boys who come to Vientiuno (that’s the name of the boys’ home) have been picked up off the streets, but not all of them are orphans. Some have run away from home. Others come from families who can’t support them because there are too many kids and not enough money, or because the boy has a mental disorder that makes him difficult to take care of. They are all so special. I can’t believe I’m being this sappy, it’s really not me, but I just love them.

We only spend a couple hours at a time there and it always seems to fly by. We bring board games and cards and books to share with them and they just eat it all up. By now it has kind of become standard that I play Skip-Bo with Joel, Bryan, Hector, and whoever else decides to join us. We teach anyone who doesn’t know how to play yet, but it’s always at least the three of us. We just joke around and laugh at each other. Last time Joel and Bryan rapped the whole time we played, a song that is definitely not Jesus-approved, but they were hilarious. All the boys know our names and that we come just to have play and have fun, and I think everyone involved looks forward to the time we spend there. I love to just love them. The more time we’re there, the more I realize how hard it will be for me to leave them behind in just a couple weeks.

Recap

I can’t believe I’ve neglected my blog for so long! Without a doubt the past 3 weeks have been a jam packed, nonstop whirlwind, so I guess I’ll start by skimming over what all has been going on. Not my favorite kind of blog to write, but I feel like there are huge blanks to fill in.

After Dad and Shark left, all of our bodies decided that it was time for us to get sick. Alli was gone visiting home but Darwin, Amber, Tess, and I were all sick for about three days at the same time. Amber and Tess had swine flu symptoms and we thought they were going to have to be quarantined at Hospital Escuela, the scariest hospital on the face of the earth. But it’s all good, it was just the regular flu and they lived to tell about it. I had some stomach thing, it was probably just food poisoning since it was pretty short lived. Darwin had a bunch of random symptoms, who knows what his problem was. But we’re all better now, life goes on.

As soon as we all got better, spring breakers started getting here. First to arrive was Bob, a friend of Amber’s. He got here from Oklahoma on the day that Alli came back, which was before the rest of the group got here. He is the one who started the Shine program with the first graders we tutor who are on scholarship at a bilingual school. He was so much fun to have around, he always made sure we were entertained and well fed and was just wonderful! Before everyone else got here we went to the movies, the circus, and the water park with the Shine kids. A few days later the rest of the group started trickling in and by Sunday all 45 or so were here. About a third was from Dell City, OK an the rest were from the Memorial Road church in OK. A few of Amber’s closer friends stayed with us at her house which made for cramped quarters but also for a lot of fun times!

Having the groups here was definitely a blast. We spent time in El Magote doing a VBS and a few days at Jovenes en Camino pouring concrete and hanging out with the boys who live there. Everyone in the group worked hard all week and got along really well, and there were a lot of college kids that Alli and Tess and I hit it off with. Tess had to fly home unexpectedly because of a family emergency about a week ago and now that she’s gone and the group has left Alli and I can’t get over how much we miss everyone. Our house feels so empty! We had a fantastic week that provided a lot of new friends and great memories.

Over the course of the week Amber took a lot of the group members out to feed with her. She had a full car every time so I gave up my spot to let others experience it. By the beginning of this week I was surprised at how excited I was to go back out with her! I had really missed seeing everyone and serving them and laughing with them. But while I missed being out with everyone, I’m also glad that so many people got to see the work that Amber does with the homeless feeding. Hopefully that will allow more people to see that this is a ministry worth supporting.

Lately we’ve also been spending a lot of time at a local boys’ home. We got connected with it when one of the kids from the homeless feeding got attacked on a bus and, after a stint in the hospital, was sent to live there. On any given day there are between 40 and 60 boys in this cramped little building. The staff is very kind to the boys but they don’t have any planned activities from day to day, so we have been going to visit them and bringing cards and board games. Amber has really taken this place and the boys there into her heart and always talks about wanting to bring all of them home with her. They really are sweet kids and it’s hard to see that they have ended up where they are because of the rough lives they’ve lived. It has been a pretty interesting experience going a few times a week and seeing old and new faces and building more relationships with them. It’s hard not to just love them.

OK well I think that pretty much covers the big things about the past few weeks. Sorry for the length, but I think I did a pretty good job of covering 3 weeks in one post. I love and miss you all and can’t tell you how much I appreciate all of your love and support and prayers :)

On a Mission

Ever since I first approached the Global Missions team at church about using the missions internship for this trip to Honduras, I’ve had this feeling of being kind of a poser. I’ve felt that way because people keep asking me if I’m taking this trip because I’m thinking about being a missionary in the future, or even assuming that that’s the case. I’ve really felt guilty about saying that those are not my plans. Now I’ve learned that God’s plans aren’t always on the same page as my own plans and that His generally trump mine, but I still answer that question by saying that I don’t have plans to be a “missionary” long term in the future.

However, after I was yet again asked the same question the other day, I got to thinking about my answer and what being a “missionary” really means. And I think I’ve changed my mind. I think we’re all missionaries, but not in the connotation under which I had originally put the word. When I’ve thought of a missionary, the image that has always come to my head has been one of a really brave, independent, young-ish person who ventures off into some unknown country, the “mission field,” where he or she doesn’t know or understand the language or culture and proceeds to assimilate him- or herself with the people there, develop relationships with them, and share Christ’s love through word and action. I wouldn’t say that describes me or my preferred scene very well, and if that’s the definition of a missionary I would definitely not put myself in that category, especially not long term. But once I got to thinking about it, I realized that that is a ridiculously narrow description of a missionary.

The reality is that, whether we like it or not, every Christian is called to be a missionary. The only difference is the “field” in which we serve. You may not be called to drop everything and move to Antarctica where you have to build a hut out of ice cubes and eat whale blubber and convert all the Eskimos, but that doesn’t mean you won’t be called to serve in some other way. You might find that God opens doors for you to minister to the homeless in your own city. Maybe your mission field will be at PTO meetings at your child’s school or in the conference room in your office. Or maybe you are the best person to be an example of Christian living to the people right in your own home. No place is too small or too close to home to be a mission field. I am totally convinced that God can use anyone, at any age, in any place. I have friends my age and younger whose desire to serve God and whose ingenuity in finding ways to do so inspires me, and on the other end of the spectrum, I love and admire that my Grandma at 80 years old still has a huge heart for all sorts of missions and always has a contagious excitement when I tell her about the mission work I’m involved in. God doesn’t have rules or boundaries that limit Him to using a certain kind of person to accomplish His purposes. I guess that what I’m really trying to say is that God won’t fit in the box I had put Him in, and I’m unusually pleased to find out that I’ve been wrong.

You never know where you’ll end up, and I doubt God will ever stop reminding me of that. My prayer is that He will always be able to use me to help build His kingdom and that I won’t ever neglect to show His love in whatever mission field I’m called into. That might mean that I never leave the country again. Or maybe I’ll end up in Antarctica. I wouldn’t mind having a pet penguin.

"Love" is English for "Amor"

This week I have really started to feel like I’m getting more of a grasp of Spanish than I’ve had so far. It’s so good! I mean I’m still definitely not fluent or anything like that, but I’m finding that I generally and consistently understand more of what people are saying. It has made me more confident in having conversations, which means I’m getting even more practice, and it’s just one big happy circle!

I’ve also come to appreciate knowing Spanish more this week with Dad and Shark here. It’s easy to lose sight of the fact that not everybody speaks the same language you do until you are forced into a situation where practically nobody speaks the same language you do. I understand and speak enough Spanish that that’s not really an issue for me, and I don’t really think about it until I see other people struggling to communicate. Last night at dinner our waiter offered to take a picture for us and John tried to inform him of how to use the camera by saying “and there’s the zoom!” We all laughed because, of course, the waiter had no idea what John was saying, but when you don’t speak the language you don’t have a choice but to communicate the only way you know how. I have to imagine what it would be like for me if I went to Japan or somewhere like that. I wouldn’t even have any idea of where to start…I would be completely lost! That would be such a frustrating feeling. I’ve heard enough frustration voiced over the language barrier that I will forever be an advocate of learning a second or third language, and this is my plug for doing just that!

It has also been great to have Dad and Shark here this week just so that they can see what I’ve been up to and what God has been up to these past six weeks. Yesterday we went to the house Amber is looking to buy for the Breaking Chains ministry to work on cleaning it up a little bit. The whole house itself is a beautiful piece of architecture and we took a lot of pictures, but they’re all on other cameras (and I wouldn’t be technologically savvy enough to put them up here even if I did have them lol). So suffice it to say that there’s a big courtyard in the middle of the two-story house and it has several little plots that are all overgrown with these unidentified plants, some of which are really spiky and almost all of which are dead and need to be removed. So our job for the day was to clear out those plots and do some general cleaning up. On our way in we ran into a few women who we usually see on our feeding nights, and they came into the house with us and were eager to help us clean. We got most of the courtyard cleared out and a lot of sweeping done in just about an hour, which would never have been possible without their help. It was so cool to see them having a hand in getting the building ready that will potentially be purchased and put to use for their benefit! As we were leaving, several other people we feed came by the house to check it out and everyone wanted to know when they could come back and help clean again. The whole thing was an awesome sight to see! I hope John and Dad can appreciate the gravity of what they saw there, and if you know them you should definitely ask them about it. It is so exciting to think about what opening the doors of that house could do for Amber’s ministry and for the lives of the people who helped us yesterday. Please be praying that God opens His doors to allow that to happen!

Acculturated

That’s such a funny word. It makes me think of cheese. I know it’s weird, but isn’t cheese cultured? Speaking of cheese, Honduran cheese tastes a little funky. It’s kind of more sour tasting, but not in a bad way…it’s just different.

You’ll have to excuse my digression because, believe it or not, I didn’t choose this title because I wanted to talk about cheese. I picked it because that’s how I’m starting to feel. Acculturated. I had to look up the word because I wasn’t sure it was the exact one I wanted to use but when I read the definition (to have absorbed and assimilated the culture of another group of people or another person; to have changed somebody’s cultural behavior and thinking through contact with another culture) I decided it was definitely the right word for how I feel. Over the past couple of days I’ve been finding myself forgetting, I guess you could say, that I’m here in Honduras. It’s hard to describe. There’s this park right down the street from Amber’s house and a lot of mornings I’ll go sit and read on this bench there that has the most amazing view of the city. This morning I was sitting there and every time I looked up from my book I would look around and think “oh yeah, I’m in Honduras…I’d forgotten.” And now it’s becoming really easy to tell people apart, where as when I first got here everyone just looked “Honduran” and faces would kind of run together. It’s not weird that I’m not surrounded by a bunch of white people…in fact I think it will be kind of weird going back to the States, and even more at Lipscomb where that’s pretty much all there is lol. I don’t feel so weird about getting stared at by guys (which, by the way, is not a testament to how attractive you are, it’s purely related to the fact that you’re a girl and, as an added bonus, you’re white). I guess I don’t really notice it anymore. Just little things like that that I’ve been noticing and have made me think I’m just becoming “acculturated.” And in a good way, not like funky cheese.

Joy!

This week has been so full of blessings, I don’t even know where to begin or if I’ll be able to remember them all! I’ll just pick and choose the biggest ones.

Did you know that life doesn’t stop just because you decide to step out of the picture? It’s true. Believe it or not, your friends keep living their normal lives no matter what you’re doing with your own. I guess that realization kind of hit me at the beginning of this week and I started feeling really homesick. The first couple days this week were a little rough, and Wednesday was probably the worst. But then on Wednesday night I got to talk to my mom and Matthew, and then I got on Facebook and a bunch of my friends messaged me and by the end of the night I felt like I had talked to just the right people and had all the right conversations and was feeling much better. It just reminded me that God is definitely faithful!

Last night we had feeding, as usual for a Thursday night, but Darwin had a never-ending dentist appointment and we didn’t get out of the house to start feeding until about an hour after we usually leave. We weren’t sure how many people would actually be out since we were showing up so late, but we ended up seeing pretty much the same people as usual. Our third stop is at a little park and when we got there, there was a mariachi band playing on the corner. One of the guys who is usually at that stop, Junior, often sings mariachi songs for us and uses our water jug as a drum to accompany him, and he was over singing along with the band. After we had finished feeding, a few of the homeless guys walked over with Darwin, Alli, Tess, Amber, and me to where the mariachi band was and proceeded to ask us to dance with them. It was honestly so much fun to see them in that element, having a great time and dancing and laughing. It makes me wish that that were more what their lives were like, full of that joy we saw them with last night.

Today the four first graders we tutor in the Shine program (Escarleth, José, Dayana, and Claudy) didn’t have any homework, so we walked down to the river next to the church at Mateo. We ran around and played in the water and tried not to get too soaked : ) The kids found a bunch of tadpoles and Alli and Tess decided that it would be a brilliant idea to collect them in a two liter bottle and take them home to wait for them to morph into frogs, so we all had a blast trying to catch all these tadpoles and create a little habitat for them in this bottle (which is currently sitting here in our room and will no doubt start to smell like death pretty soon). I love working with them because you kind of get to get out of your own head and just act like a little kid for a while…they’re so carefree and I love that about them!

I really wanted to share all of the positives that I’ve encountered this week, and going back to think about all of them to write them here has made me realize again just how blessed I’ve been to be able to work here in Honduras. I came to help make a difference in the lives of people here, but I feel like I’ve been affected by them more than the other way around. I don’t say that to mean that I don’t feel like I’m accomplishing anything here, I just mean that what I’m experiencing here is so awesome, and I’m really glad I can share that with you all! I hope you can sense just a little bit of my joy!

Contradictions

I meant to blog on Wednesday but time got away from me and all of a sudden it’s Sunday! Not only that, it’s also Valentine’s Day! Here they call it El Día de Amistad, which means Day of Friendship. It’s kind of a big deal, like seriously everybody celebrates it, but it’s more common to do special stuff w your friends instead of w your significant other. Let’s just say that Hallmark would not make a killing in Honduras like they do in the States. I personally like it better this way : )

We’ve been hanging out a lot with the two couples from VCOM who are here working in the clinic, and this weekend we all went to the island of Amapala for a little R&R. It was such a great weekend, we swam in the ocean and got stung by baby jellyfish and got really interesting sunburns and a ton of mosquito bites and played with a bunch of really fun Honduran kids who live on the beach and ate incredible food for dirt cheap prices. It felt like a legit exotic island…well I guess it kind of was! I didn’t have my computer with me, so I was able to block out all school and other obligations and it was so relaxing. I couldn’t have asked for anything better!

This vacation came after a week full of some interesting events. Like I mentioned in my last post, we went to feed lunch at the dump on Wednesday. You could smell the place before you even got to it, and it was awful, like sour milk and nasty trash (pretty typical for a dump, I would think). We drove up the hill to where we were going to be feeding, past mountains and mountains of trash and debris. It seemed like the mountain itself was made out of trash. When we got to the top, it was an intense sight. We were basically on a massive plateau of garbage and there were four groups present: dogs, buzzards, cows, and people. The guy who we were there to help feed, Mike, told us that when the garbage trucks come to dump trash, all of the people and animals flock to the trucks. There is no apparent difference between the animals and people. Randomly around us there were scattered piles of random garbage that turned out to be people’s homes. What a degrading way to live, living among piles of trash and demoted to the level of animals. The feeding itself was pretty similar to what we do at the stadium, but the location on Wednesday made it more difficult for me to stomach.

The title of this post is Contradictions, and that comes into play for me in two aspects. First of all, as you’re standing on top of this mountain of garbage, you look around and realize that you also have an incredible view of God’s creation, the surrounding mountains and valleys that make up the Honduran landscape. People in the States would pay millions of dollars for a view like it, but these people get it for free and if I were in their shoes I would pay millions of dollars to be anywhere but there. It just seems so backwards. But second and more importantly, is there any worse contradiction than for smelly piles of garbage or dirty street corners to be the homes of the people God created to be His children? Humans weren’t created to live in heaps of trash, we were created for the Garden of Eden. Granted, none of us lives in the Garden of Eden, or anything remotely close to it for that matter, but a home made out of cardboard and used tires isn’t exactly the next best thing.

I know this is getting long but it’s what’s on my heart tonight. I don’t want people back home to feel like this is an issue that is far removed from the States, that it only affects people in third world countries like Honduras. Go downtown, go to the soup kitchens and to the street corners. The poverty of God’s precious children is all around us. How long will we stand by and let the contradiction remain the way it is, when God is calling to us to bring justice to the people He has created?

Isaiah 58:6-7

Three weeks already?!

Well, last week was completely LOCO and I’m stinking exhausted, but I had an absolute blast! In fact, I think I had more fun last week than anyone else lol. It’s amazing how much fun you can have when you don’t acknowledge the stressors and look for the best in the people around you rather than the worst. The VCOM students were so much fun to work with, and it was a totally different experience than I’d had here before. We’ve done medical missions when our church has come down here, and I’ve translated in the clinic, but I feel like I got so much more out of it this time. I was really focused on trying to connect with the people I was working with, both the patients and the students. It’s amazing how much you can learn about someone after spending just a few minutes with them, and even more after a few days. Just putting your hand on someone’s shoulder and genuinely asking them how they’re doing always seems to put a smile on their face. I know it sounds cliché, but smiles make people happy and there aren’t many things that can make you happier than knowing you put that smile on a person’s face.

This week is back to business as usual. Even as good as last week was, I’m glad to be back to the old schedule where I actually feel like I have time to breathe. We’re back to feeding, which I love, and tutoring the Shine kids. Yesterday we had a Superbowl party (let’s just say I was making a rather extravagant scene during most of the fourth quarter), but the point is that at the party there was a missionary couple who feed lunch to the homeless people at the dump on Wednesdays and I think we’re going to go with them to do that this week, and I’m definitely looking forward to that. I’m anticipating that it will be a much different experience than I’ve had here yet, so I’ll update after that happens.

One interesting thing I’m noticing is that as my Spanish improves, my English seems to be getting worse. I mentioned it to Amber and she said that the same thing happened to her when she first got here. She said it’s because you have to fit your English vocabulary into such a smaller number of Spanish words and consequently that gets mirrored back to your English too. And that sounds exactly right to me. I’ve never been especially great at verbal communication anyway, so now I just find myself tripping over words in English even more than usual lol. At least it makes for good entertainment for Amber and Alli and Tess! And hopefully it’s proof that my Spanish is getting better!

Before I left, I asked a lot of you at home to be praying that I would have confidence in what I’m doing here. I want to follow through on that by saying that I think those prayers have been answered thus far. I still don’t know exactly what my purpose here is, but I have no doubt that even if I never have some huge revelation about what exactly it is, I have been able to touch people and build for God’s kingdom here. And I know that after only being here for three weeks! I can’t imagine what the next ten will bring! Thank you all for all of the prayers you’ve been lifting up for me, they’re very much appreciated! I love you!

Learning

Yesterday was our first day helping the VCOM med students at the clinic, and it was definitely an exciting experience. They are first year students who know just about as much about medicine as I do. The only thing different is that they know all the technical terms for body parts and stuff. But for example, I was translating in the room where the students were taking vitals (triage I guess, for you medical people who know what that is), and one of the students came in and didn’t know how to use a thermometer. It was one of the ones that looks like a stick that you stick in a box. I don’t know, but every doctor I’ve been to has used one like it so I’ve definitely seen them before and know how they work. And none of the students who worked in my room today knew how to use a personal blood glucose monitor. I’ve seen them on TV commercials and they’re not super difficult to use. So I was teaching a med student how to take temperatures and blood glucose readings. I felt like I was a med student myself, soaking up all the medical terms and procedural details from the nurse who works at the clinic and other people who knew what they were doing. I definitely left knowing a lot more than I did when I got there, and about things I never expected to or intended to learn. It’s cool what you can see when you open your eyes!

I found myself in an interesting position today. I’m usually the one visiting Honduras on a short-term mission, but today it was like I was the reigning expert on all things Honduras-related. The med students just assumed that because I had been to Honduras before and am working here as a longer-term intern, I automatically knew what was going on. They were all very wide-eyed and out of their comfort zone when they arrived, and between yesterday and today it has been amazing to see how much my having confidence around them gives them more confidence. Don’t get me wrong, I never pretend to know what’s going on if I don’t, but I do try to seem confident in what I’m doing. I’m able to see things from both perspectives now. I’ve been on short-term missions where on the first day you just want to be around someone who knows what they’re doing and how to handle the culture. For me, that person in Honduras has always been Amber. Having been here for a couple weeks now, I realize that the sun doesn’t rise and fall on Amber and that she is just a normal person, but every other time I’ve been here she has seemed superhuman somehow, as if she was the key to unlocking the secrets of Honduran culture because she has been here for a long time and generally seems to know what’s going on. Now I see that my perception of her was very much born from the confidence she exudes, and I see that having that same confidence about myself and what I’m doing can provide that same comfort to others.

It didn’t take me very long to realize that it’s really not difficult to encourage people and make feel good about themselves and that I really like doing it. I mean, I’ve always known that about myself, but I guess it was just more profound in this setting. So many little things show people that you care and can make them feel more comfortable. Making a real effort to know people’s names and calling them by them often is surprisingly effective. Noticing something special about specific people and complimenting them on those attributes really lights them up too. Not flattery, I’m talking about qualities you genuinely think are great about that person. And smiles can never be overestimated!!! These first year med students were just thrown into these crazy situations, trying to communicate in a foreign country using a foreign language, and they needed as many confidence boosters as they could get. And by providing that for those med students today, I felt like I helped them even more than I helped the patients themselves, which was not what I had expected, but not at all an unfulfilling way to spend my day!

And thanks for all of the prayers, I can guarantee that they are having the desired effects. Keep it up! God is amazing, and let's not forget to tell Him so!

Tonight I love Honduras

Tonight I love Honduras. I love the way it smells, the gasoline and the night air, the way it looks, the full moon and the clouds and the stars and the blackness and all the little lights on the mountainsides, the way it sounds, the honking horns and the laughing children and the diesel engines revving and the music in a language with words I don’t understand, the way it feels, the wind in my face and my hands and feet that are never clean. I love the people I’m with, the ones I know and the ones I don’t, the ones who live in houses and the ones who live on the street, the ones I see every day and the ones I’ll only see once, the little ones and the grown up ones, the ones who like me and the ones who don’t. I love the time I’ve spent here, I love the time ahead of me here. One day I won’t remember what the stars looked like tonight and the way the air smelled, but tonight I have it all right here in front of me and I love it. And I wish you could be here to love it with me. Because I know you would. How could you not?

Glue

Both Alli and I currently have huge chunks of glue stuck in our hair. Tonight was definitely an eventful feeding. The first stop was pretty entertaining actually, some of the people wanted to know what their names meant in English. A lot of them were just the same as they are in Spanish, but they all got a kick out of hearing us pronounce them in English. Then we got to the second stop and things got crazy. Everyone was really high and belligerent. First there was a really bad fight that broke out, a bunch of guys were beating up another guy for some reason, and it went on for quite a while. Then there was this lady who was pregnant and was saying that she needed food for her baby, but she didn’t like what we had tonight so she just threw it on the ground. Then there was a guy who wanted hot sauce with his dinner and we didn’t have any, so he threw the whole bowl back into our tub of soup. Then the first lady came back and first of all didn’t remember having thrown the soup before, and then was asking Alli and Tess and me questions and just being really forward. Darwin and Amber were cleaning people up from the fight and trying to sort out other conflicts off to the side. This is where the glue comes in. We asked the lady what her problem was with us and she told us that it was because we were Gringas (Americans), and then grabbed my hair. I asked her not to touch me and she said well if you don’t want me to touch you then you can just leave! She kept getting in our faces and was grabbing Alli’s hair too, and when I had my back turned she grabbed my hair again and I yelled at her not to touch me, and by then Darwin was running over and he walked her off and tried to calm her down. The reason all this was happening is because everyone is so high, and a lot of them get high on glue. They put it in bottles or bags and sniff it. The lady who grabbed our hair had been holding a bottle of glue and it was all over her hands when she touched us.

We went to our third stop where things were much more subdued, but on the way home we were all a little frustrated with the craziness. We had run out of tortillas at the last stop and I started thinking, we should have saved the tortillas at the second stop so we could have given them out at the last one where they wouldn’t have been wasted and where the people were so much better and, in my opinion, deserving, at least tonight. But then I got to thinking, how backwards is that? Is that the way God loves people? Would he save the best things for the people who appreciate them the most? I don’t know for sure, but I really don’t think so. When Jesus healed the ten men with leprosy only one came back and thanked him, but that didn’t keep him from healing all of them anyway. He didn’t withhold love from the others just because they didn’t reciprocate it.

I guess what I’m saying is that loving people like Jesus did is worth a little glue in your hair.

Surprises

I wrote all this last night and just didn’t have time to post it, but there was more that happened today so I’ll write again and post it later.

So usually when we do the stadium feeding we go to three places. First we go to this bus stop kind of place right outside the stadium. Then we go to two kind of alley, side street type places and hand out food from out of the back of Amber’s truck. Tonight after we went to those three places we still had quite a bit of food left over. One of the women at our last stop, Jenny, said that there were people where she lived who could use the leftover food, so we had her get in the car with us and give us directions to get there. She took us to this bridge near the stadium that she apparently lives underneath with about 18 other people. There’s this steep hill that leads down under the bridge and all of a sudden people just started coming up over the hill. So we fed them. It was crazy. Amber had Darwin go down under the bridge and take pictures so that we could see how they lived there and he couldn’t get a very good picture because it was so dark, but let me tell you, it’s awful down there.

Another weird thing happened at our first stop by the stadium. When we were there on Thursday there would be people who would walk by us every once in a while, I mean it’s a normal street sidewalk so that wasn’t weird. But tonight there were seriously droves of people, groups of guys and an occasional girlfriend that just kept walking by us, and a lot of times they would ask for our food, and we’d have to tell them no, you’re not living on the street, go home and get your own food. Like I said, we were right there by the stadium so I figured there had been a futbol game going on and I asked Alli if that was the case. But she said no, every Saturday night one of the local gangs has a meeting at the stadium and these are all the people leaving from the meeting. Talk about a shocker! I knew there were gangs around, but there were SO many people there, and that was just from one gang! When we got in the car to go to the next stop I asked Amber about it and she confirmed it, and she said that the first people who walk by are on the lowest tier of the gang and higher up you get in the gang’s social ladder the longer you get to stay at the meeting. They were still coming when we left so I really have no idea how many more there would have been and how important the people who were walking by us were. And what do you talk about at a gang meeting??? I have no clue.

The thing that throws me off is that I feel like the people here all look the same. And I don’t mean that to say that I’m an American and I can’t tell these people apart because they’re all Latino and they all look the same to me, I just mean that I can’t tell a difference between the people who have houses and cars the people who are in a gang and the people who live under the bridges. There’s not really a difference in the types of clothes they wear or anything like that. In the U.S. social class is distinguished by the kind of car you drive and the brands of clothing you wear, but here it’s just not like that. Maybe native Hondurans can tell a difference but I sure can’t. I’m not sure what that has to do with anything, just an observation about the culture I guess.

Oh, this was fun. Early this afternoon Tess and Alli and I went to the park just to hang out and read and talk. We were sitting on this ledge that surrounded a basketball court and we'd been there for probably 45 minutes or so and Tess had been complaining about how hot it was and that it was starting to make her feel sick, so we started to get our stuff together to leave. All of a sudden she goes "omigosh" and leans over and faints and just falls off the ledge and hits her head on the concrete! It was so scary! Alli ran over to her and started trying to wake her up and all I knew to do was run and get Amber. I didn't even stop to put my shoes on, I just ran home. By the time we got back Tess was awake, but she was pretty shaken up. We called the doctor and he said that unless she faints again she's probably fine, it was just a one-time thing. She's doing a lot better now, and we've been laughing about it and how scary it was at the time. She's got a pretty nice scrape on her face where she landed and we've been trying to make up good stories to tell people about how she got it. The best one so far is that Amber beats her...if it were anyone else that probably wouldn't fly but since everyone knows Amber would be the last person to beat her interns I think it's a winner lol.

Fingernail clippers!

I knew I was going to forget something. But of all the things I could have forgotten, did it have to be fingernail clippers? How am I supposed to survive 3 months without those? I’m probably going to develop a nail-biting habit. I should probably just go home now, this whole trip is pretty much ruined.

Haha just kidding! I really did forget my fingernail clippers though. But I’ll probably survive. Fingers crossed.

Well I obviously got here safely, so I won’t go into all the boring details of travel and such. I’m really thankful for all of your prayers for that. I’ve only been here for like 36 hours and so much has happened already! Two other interns, Alli and Tess, arrived yesterday too and we’ve definitely hit the ground running. We did tutoring yesterday and today, went to church in El Magote (a slum kind of area in the city), and fed the homeless by the stadium tonight. For those of you who know about that ministry and have been curious as to what it’s like, sorry to disappoint but it’s not something that can be explained in words. You just have to experience it. In the parable of the sheep and the goats in Matthew 25 Jesus says “For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink” and to literally put that into practice, to hand food to someone who has none, that’s an indescribable feeling. And I love church services here…in the U.S. I feel like singing can sometimes get to be about sounding good, whereas here it’s all about being loud and showing God that you’re passionate about what you’re singing, letting Him hear what’s in your heart. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that worshippers here are perfect and that at home we’re awful and our hearts are in the wrong place, I’m just saying that it’s a different atmosphere. I can’t wait to go again tomorrow night!

Next Wednesday the new Honduran president takes office, so please be praying that everything with that will go smoothly. We’re going to take that day off and just stay around the house, just to play it safe. The sketchy political situation here is pretty much common knowledge, so we’re not worried but we are aware that there is always the possibility of drama. As far as I’m concerned, I think it will take a couple weeks for me to get more comfortable with everything…the language barrier makes it pretty difficult to communicate sometimes. “But Mackenzie, you’re a Spanish major, shouldn’t the language not be a problem for you?!?” OK if I were already a pro at Spanish I wouldn’t be studying it at school! It’s a learning process and it’s super tough, but ending up closer to fluency will most definitely be worth it. But just pray that I’ll be able to continue to get adjusted to the culture and the language quickly. And of course be praying for the people I come in contact with here, they’re all beautiful and wonderful!

And that I can make it three months without my fingernail clippers.

Well I could go on all night but this is already super long, so I’ll save the rest for later. Buenas noches! Que vaya con Dios!

Muchas gracias! (Thank you very much!)

Aaah, first post, and I haven't even left yet! I'm not a blogger, so we'll see how this plays out. I promise I'm going to make an effort to post as much as I can though, I know that a lot of people who are supporting me have asked if I'm going to be keeping a blog, so I want to honor their interest in what's going on while I'm in Honduras. And pictures, hopefully there will be some of those too! But in return, I'm going to throw in some Spanish here and there and I expect all of you to be fluent by the time I get back. Haha, just kidding :) But really, learn Spanish. If nothing else, it builds character, just ask Chris Lamb or anyone else who was in our 8 a.m. Advanced Grammar class last semester.

People have been asking me for like a week if I've packed yet. Do you know me? Of course I haven't packed yet. That's a job for Tuesday night. But, against my nature, I did get my suitcase out of the attic today and throw in about a billion t-shirts (all proudly repping Lipscomb, of course) and shorts that I'm pretty sure I won't be needing in the forty degree weather here over the next two days. I looked at the forecast in Tegucigalpa and its predicting highs in the eighties and sunshine. So apparently you don't have to die to go to heaven, you just have to go south. Just in case you were wondering.

Anyway, I really just want to say that I've been completely overwhelmed by all the love and support I've gotten from those who know about this trip. I can't count the number of hugs I got at church today, so thanks to everyone at North Central who has let me know that they are behind me and praying for me, it really means so much! And to all my friends who think that this is a worthwhile thing that I'm doing and that they love me no matter where I am in the world. You know who you are, and I love you back :) And of course to my family, who I know is proud that I'm doing what God is most definitely calling me to do. Sorry I sent you into shock back in October when I told you about my very vague plans (that are only slightly less vague now), but I'm glad you came to terms w everything, I couldn't have gotten all the pieces together without you! I know I'll have more thanks at the end of my trip, but for now that will do.

I'm beyond grateful that I've always had so so so many wonderful people in my life who have been committed to lifting me up to God in prayer, and I have no doubt that I wouldn't be the person I am today without those prayers. So for those of you who fit into that category, or if you'd like to at least temporarily join that category, there are a few things I'd really appreciate prayers for as I'm preparing to leave and starting out my time in Honduras. First, that I would have confidence in my ability to do the work God has called me to Honduras to do. I know that He wouldn't have guided me to this place if He didn't have a way to use me, but I don't know exactly how He plans to do that at this point. Also, that I would stay healthy and safe so that I can be an effective Kingdom worker. And most of all, that God would open my heart and the hearts of those with whom I come in contact to the ways He can enrich our lives and also to the ways we can enrich each other's lives. That has to be what I'm most excited about, it gives me butterflies just thinking about it! Those who are older and wiser and have more missions experience, and life experience in general, will also probably have more of an idea of what else I'll need prayers for while I'm there, so you can add to the list, but those are the things that are on my heart right now and should at least give you a good place to start. Thank you so much!

There's a lot more I could say, but ADD is a growing issue these days and I know half of you lost interest after the first paragraph, so I'll cut it off here for now. Get excited about this, I know I am! Hasta luego! (Until next time!)